Still, the tears fill my eyes every time I think of the moment in which I was told you were going to be born with Down syndrome. That feeling of powerlessness and confusion and that desperate cry for help when no one around seems to understand what’s going on. Fourteen years ago my only chance seemed to be to escape from everything I knew in order to start over in the name of love. Fourteen years ago, I hopped on the plane that brought me to the United States pregnant with you, Emir.
To be honest, I didn`t know what I was doing at the time. My decision didn’t really have much logic behind it but love is illogical. Still, I didn’t know if this was the right choice. My heart kept telling me that I was doing what would be best for you, and today, when I look at you becoming this young man, Emir, I know I made the best choice: for you, for me, and for your sister who came later to complete our family.
Fourteen years is a long time and our lives have been full of challenging stories with happy endings. I am not going to lie, those happy endings have never been easy but because of that, they are even more valuable. You are the strongest and most amazing human being I`ve ever known, and I mean it. When I look at you I feel proud for raising such an amazing guy. You make me laugh, you make me strong, you fill my existence with passion and hope. I can’t imagine my life without you. Despite so often doubting my ability to be a good mom, your love keeps pushing me to believe, to overcome the stumbles, and to keep me growing along with you.
So many times I have fallen and you always raise me up. Your greatness protects me while your simplicity strengthens me. You are living proof that God doesn’t make mistakes. You are my direct connection to that higher power and at the same time my ground wire. I am just fascinated by all the things you have taught me throughout the years, and I can’t wait for what is still to come.
Young man, big boy, mama’s baby… Whatever I call you, I always mean the same: I love you with all my heart and soul and I am nothing without you. You are turning 14 years old, my love. Fourteen amazing, incredible, and incomparable years that changed everything. I could never have imagined how a child could change the world like you did. You have changed my world for good, you have inspired me to believe in second chances. You came to heal me with your love and show me a better way. I promise you to keep going for you, to never give up on you, and to ensure you are loved in the good and bad times, always with lots of smiles along the journey.
Happy birthday, Son. Thank you for fourteen years of true love. I love you, Emir.
